Oprah Could Beat Me In a Race.

My “Ask Coach Jenny” RSS feed popped up a “Predicting Your Half Marathon Race Time” article, and naturally, I had to click. After plugging in my lastest pathetic 4 miler, on the cusp of my return from a flag football injury, the handy calculator at Runner’s World predicted I could be clocked with a sun dial, and would cross the marathon tape in 5:04:16.

Let me put that time in perspective for you. Courtesy of the Complete Running Blog Network, I give you 25 celebrities who would torch me and Van Halen’s answer to the 6-hour sprint. Additionally, I’ve run 3:30 and 4:00 times in past marathons, so humbling doesn’t even define my reaction.

Actor Marathoners
	Meredith Baxter, Family Ties, New York City Marathon4:08:30
	William Baldwin, New York City Marathon 3:24:29
	Anthony Edwards, Chicago Marathon 3:55:40
	David James Elliott, JAG, Boston Marathon 4:57:23
	Will Ferrell, Boston Marathon 3:56:12
	Mario López, Saved by the Bell, Boston Marathon 5:41:41
	Joan Van Ark, Santa Ana 1979 3:35:00
	Peter Weller, New York City Marathon 3:51:26.
	Freddie Prinze, Jr., Los Angeles Marathon 5:50:49
TV Personality Marathoners
	Danni Boatwright, Winner: Survivor: Guatemala, Nashville Country Music Marathon 4:23:24.
	Lisa Ling, formerly of The View, Boston Marathon 4:34:18
	Oprah Winfrey, Marine Corps Marathon 4:29:20
Musician Marathoners
	P. Diddy (Sean Combs), New York City Marathon 4:14:54
	David Lee Roth, former lead singer of Van Halen, New York City Marathon 6:04:43
	Björn Ulvaeus, former member of Swedish band ABBA, Stockholm Marathon. 3:23:54
Athlete Marathoners
	Lance Armstrong, Seven-time Tour de France champion and triathlete, New York City Marathon 2:59:36
	Kerri Strug, Gymnast, Houston Marathon. 4:12:06
	Lynn Swann, former Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver, New York City 4:26:21
Politician Marathoners
	George W. Bush, 43rd President of the United States, Houston Marathon 3:44:52
	Michael Dukakis, Former Governor of Massachusetts, Boston Marathon 3:31:00
	John Edwards, Former United States Senator, Marine Corps Marathon 3:30:18
	Al Gore, Vice President of the United States at the time, Marine Corps Marathon 4:58:25
	Mikuláš Dzurinda, Prime Minister of Slovakia, Malokarpatsky Marathon 2:54:57
Model Marathoners
	Kim Alexis, model, New York City Marathon 3:52:00
	Ali Landry, model, Boston Marathon 5:41:41

Oprah. Ugh. Well, at least I could take AC Slater. Whew, I got work to do…

~ by tdparnell on April 8, 2008.